Plague Of The Hybrids!
Government Acts
The Issue
Angry farmers have taken to the streets demanding the government to act after reported sightings of strange sabertooth-tiger-like dogs eating all the crops in fields.
The Debate
"This unholy union should never have taken place to begin with," comments Jazz Trax, an angry farmer. "The sabertooth-tiger was never meant to mate with a dog! They eat my crops, they attack my livestock and they're breeding so quickly they're swamping the environment! We can't make a living like this! You've got to give us the funds and manpower to shoot anything that comes within a mile of our property and put an end to these freaks of nature! We must wipe these creatures out now or before you know it all we'll be eating is fish."
"We can't just destroy these creatures!" exclaimed Roger Love, owner of Tarabostes's biggest safari park. "They may look ugly to you, but I think they're just beautiful. We need to study them and understand them; think of what we could learn! These wonderful beasts may be a little harmful to the environment, but think of the people who will flock to see them! It would be an educational experience! Think of the money!"
"We could always just kill off all the dogs," Hope Gutenberg of the "Keep The Species Pure" foundation whispers to you in a conversation. "The sabertooth-tiger is one of the many things our country is famous for; any perversion of its image reflects upon us all! We can't have their image spoilt by these ugly abominations! Just get the police to go around and kill them all and we can rest easy knowing our countryside is safe!
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
Compulsory Military Service Under Attack
Government Acts
The Issue
Concerned mothers and nervous school-leavers are petitioning the government to abolish compulsory military service.
The Debate
"Our children are forced to be trained to murder!" protests Aaron Licorish, chairman of the Parents Against All Things Violent organisation. "For too long now the government has been snatching away our children and training them to become killing machines. This arcane practice must be banned at once! Sure, some of them could end up breaking into cars or terrorising old people, but hey, kids will be kids, right?"
"What a preposterous idea!" scoffs Drill Sergeant Peggy Bush. "The youth of Tarabostes has never needed the discipline provided by the armed forces more than it does today, and with all those rogue states out there we need all the recruits we can get! If anything, the government should lengthen the required service and drop the minimum age to something more reasonable."
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
Water Supply Problems Becoming a Major Drain
Government Acts
The Issue
Due to the explosive population growth in Tarabostes, coupled with recent droughts, people are beginning to worry about the nation's decreasing water supply, and who should get first dibs on the vital H20.
The Debate
"We need this water to raise our crops," says incensed farmer Melbourne Dredd. "If it wasn't for us farmers, the rest of Tarabostes would be starving. How about laying the blame where it belongs, and look to those cookie cutter suburban houses with their green lawns and pristinely washed mini-vans!"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
"It is my right to have the most beautiful lawn in the neighborhood," says neighborhood spokesman Alexei Chicago. "Our community spends a lot of effort cultivating a nice environment for our kids to grow up in. Why, if they didn't have these nice lawns to play in, they would be hanging out on street corners peddling drugs, or worse! Won't someone please think of the children?"
"Here is a novel idea," proclaims Falala Falopian, spokesperson for radical environmental group Leave Nature Alone. "How about getting rid of all these dams and irrigation projects that are getting in the way of Mother Nature's plans for the water. It is time to allow the rivers to take their natural courses and leave the environment alone. I'm sure things will work out fine if we let Nature take its course."
"Obviously, who gets how much water is only a part of the problem," notes famed population-control advocate Stephanie Summers. "We must try to curtail the rapid growth of our population, whether by limiting the amount of children people may have, or by deporting immigrants and criminals... we must get a handle on our population before we can hope to correct this water supply problem."
Illegal File-Sharing Flares
Government Acts
The Issue
A surprise raid conducted on ISPs over the last week in Tarabostes shows that more than 30% of all Internet data transfer in Tarabostes at one time or another is used by illegal file-shares to illegally distribute files, most notably songs.
The Debate
"What we need to do is hack their computers and format their hard drives," says Chastity Summers, recording industry representative. "People need to be taught to not mess with the law. This is theft, pure and simple. And they're not only halving our revenue to tune of billions of forlorns, but you are also stealing a few hundredths of a forlorn from the artist for every song they steal. THINK OF THE STARVING ARTISTS!"
"Yo, dude, like, don't be hatin' man," says teenager Miranda Love. "We're like, going to change the whole structure of our society. Everything should be like, publicly available to, like, everybody, dude. Copyrights are so, like, uncool man and we need to get rid of them. That'd be totally radical, and cool as well."
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
"Yo, dang, blizzity blang, yo, this ain't, right, yo," says Buy Wu, famous rapper with three platinum albums. "Dang, yo, we dang need to copy-protect my dang CDs, yo. That dang playability life dang decreases, yo, but it's the only way to stop this, dang, yo."
joi, 31 ianuarie 2008
Rezultatele reformelor
The Federation of Tarabostes is a huge, safe nation, remarkable for its punitive income tax rates. Its compassionate, cynical population of 301 million are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.
It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, the Environment, and Education. The average income tax rate is 100%. A substantial private sector is dominated by the Information Technology industry.
Prime commercial land is being swamped with archaeological teams, an enfeebled opposition party spends most of its time simply trying to stay on the ballot, the government is spending millions on alternative clean-burning fuels, and the government pours millions of forlorns into rehabilitation programs annually. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tarabostes's national animal is the sabertooth-tiger, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its currency is the forlorn.
It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, the Environment, and Education. The average income tax rate is 100%. A substantial private sector is dominated by the Information Technology industry.
Prime commercial land is being swamped with archaeological teams, an enfeebled opposition party spends most of its time simply trying to stay on the ballot, the government is spending millions on alternative clean-burning fuels, and the government pours millions of forlorns into rehabilitation programs annually. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tarabostes's national animal is the sabertooth-tiger, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its currency is the forlorn.
marți, 29 ianuarie 2008
Pana una alta
The Federation of Tarabostes
"Assimilation by preparation"
UN Category: Father Knows Best State
Civil Rights: Below Average
Economy: Strong
Political Freedoms: Outlawed
Location: Romania
Regional Influence: Vassal
The Federation of Tarabostes is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, notable for its compulsory military service. Its hard-working, cynical population of 289 million are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.
It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, the Environment, and Education. The average income tax rate is 99%. A substantial private sector is dominated by the Information Technology industry.
The government snoops on private internet connections, the government has undertaken a massive education and health program to combat VODAIS, genetic research is temporarily tied up in government red tape, and every citizen must submit to DNA testing to be eliminated from police inquiries. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tarabostes's national animal is the sabertooth-tiger, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its currency is the forlorn.
Tarabostes is ranked 39th in the region and 36,790th in the world for Rudest Citizens.
United Nations Activity
Endorsements Received
: 6 (Istrians, Ulpia Sarmisegetuza, Lizuca, Poliarchy, Negru-Voda, CaliforniaKhann)
"Assimilation by preparation"
UN Category: Father Knows Best State
Civil Rights: Below Average
Economy: Strong
Political Freedoms: Outlawed
Location: Romania
Regional Influence: Vassal
The Federation of Tarabostes is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, notable for its compulsory military service. Its hard-working, cynical population of 289 million are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.
It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, the Environment, and Education. The average income tax rate is 99%. A substantial private sector is dominated by the Information Technology industry.
The government snoops on private internet connections, the government has undertaken a massive education and health program to combat VODAIS, genetic research is temporarily tied up in government red tape, and every citizen must submit to DNA testing to be eliminated from police inquiries. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tarabostes's national animal is the sabertooth-tiger, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its currency is the forlorn.
Tarabostes is ranked 39th in the region and 36,790th in the world for Rudest Citizens.
United Nations Activity
Endorsements Received
: 6 (Istrians, Ulpia Sarmisegetuza, Lizuca, Poliarchy, Negru-Voda, CaliforniaKhann)
Trecu ceva vreme...
Tarabostes Decides:
An Archaeological Altercation
Government Acts
The Issue
During the construction of a new Hyper-Mega-Ultra-Super Mall, construction workers have unearthed what appears to be an ancient temple. A furious debate has arisen between those who wish to preserve it, and those who need their retail therapy.
The Debate
"This is the perfect opportunity to learn more of our nation's history!" says Professor Freddy Longfellow, head of the archaeological department of the Tarabostes History Museum. "All building work must be halted immediately so that my team can study this remarkable piece of our nation's past. To bury these ruins under some concrete eyesore would be criminal!"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
"It's all very nice to get to know some more about our past," argues foreman Konrad Winters. "But that's just the thing! It's the past! We must think of the future. If you allow those decrepit fossils to take over this place, you put at risk the future of our economy! Today it's archaeological digs, tomorrow it's 'preservation of the environment'. Just let me bulldoze the worthless pile of rubble and bury it under a few hundred tonnes of concrete."
"Behold, the hour has arrived! The Holy Temple of Firefury Amahira has been unearthed!" proclaims Yon-Zhauryg v'Klot, leader of the Cult of the Undead Sabertooth-tiger. "This land is sacred, and must not be befouled by these corporations! No-one but the enlightened children of Firefury must be allowed to venture inside our rediscovered sanctuary, where we will perform the required rituals to please the Great Goddess and prevent Her from unleashing Her wrath upon the world."
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 1.
Minorities Demand Representation in TV Soaps
Government Acts
The Issue
Tarabostes's TV soaps--famous around the region--have come under fire for their lack of ethnic diversity.
The Debate
"Every night my family and I sit down to watch 'The Brash and the Backstabbing'," says Roxanne Jefferson. "But where are the Liliputians like myself? Where are the Bigtopians? The Marche Noirians? People from those cultures can be just as brash and backstabbing, but we never see them on the screen. The government must act to remove this silent apartheid from our TV screens."
"Those Liliputians don't know how good they have it," says Calvin du Pont, spokesperson for the Tasmanians Against Ethnic Stereotyping. "Tasmanians are on television all the time, but always in crude, stereotypical roles. The answer is not to enforce ethnic quotas, but to award government prizes for the positive portrayal of minorities. That'll work better, and be cheaper, too."
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
"The government should do what now?" says TV studio executive Charles Falopian. "You've got to be kidding. We make soaps here, not documentaries. I should be able to put whichever characters I want into my shows. Quotas! Government prizes! God save me! Hasn't the government got anything better to do? Why don't they just back off and let society work out these things on its own?"
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 2.
Two Parties For Too Long?
Government Acts
The Issue
Representatives of several minor political parties have joined their voices to object to stiff ballot access requirements.
The Debate
"Two-party politics is squeezing the life out of democracy in Tarabostes," laments May Winters, leader of the Pragmatic Radical Party. "The Liberal Conservatives and Progressive Traditionalists have a monopoly on public policy - or duopoly, whatever you want to call it. The point is that there's hardly any difference between them, and their chokehold on the electoral process lets hacks and crooks stay in office forever. Ballot access rules must be loosened so we can give the voters a truly democratic choice."
"People are afraid to support 'third' parties because they're afraid of seeing the 'bad guys' get elected," says Samuel Dodinas, a ballot stastician. "But if we changed the system to allow preferential voting, where you can have your votes divvied up among your other candidates if your favourite doesn't recieve a certain number of votes, then that wouldn't be a problem. Then you could let as many parties as you wanted into the game. Deserving candidates wouldn't be harmed - they'd win! Maybe a few radicals would get through, but that just proves what a great system it is!"
"What ever happened to 'one man, one vote'?" asks Bill Chicago, chairperson of the Liberal Conservative National Committee. "Changing the rules will just let all sorts of crackpots clog up the ballot and overwhelm voters with names they don't recognise - this will draw attention and support away from legitimate candidates! How do you expect the nation to function properly if the government doesn't have public support? Oh, and by the way, the Liberal Conservative Party presents a VERY clear alternative to the destructive agenda of the Progressive Traditionalists, and I'll wallop anyone who says otherwise."
"Opposition parties are such a bother," muses Bianca Gutenberg, your chief of staff. "If we allowed as many of them to be politicians as those fools in the Pragmatic Radical Party want, it would be very hard on the tax payers - and our own position in power. If we re-wrote the election rules so that a party had to reapply for recognition every time it failed to win a certain number of votes, we could knock our opposition out of the ring for good! Hey, the voters have spoken, and they asked for us. I think that just about settles it, don't you?"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 4.
Violent Violetists Demand Blood!
Government Acts
The Issue
Members of a new weird religious cult, called the Order of Violet, ask for the government to appease their mighty god by offering Her a sacrifice of the human variety.
The Debate
"What have we got to lose?" says religious freedoms advocate Falala Summers. "Just cut up a few homeless folk - it appeases this group's bloodthirsty Goddess, gets rid of unsightly bums that drain welfare, and everybody goes home happy."
"We must go much further than a few beggars!" argues the overzealous High Member of the Order of Violet, Samuel O'Bannon. "You must pass a law that everyone’s first born child must be slaughtered, on live TV if possible. Think of the viewing figures!"
"You aren't going to listen to these whackjob Violetists, are you?" comments Larry Christmas while leading a prayer group. "Human sacrifices! Surely we're too civilized to permit such barbaric practices! These lunatic fringe groups should be outlawed, their leaders should be executed!"
"Who's being a lunatic?" retorts Peggy Gutenberg of the Tarabostes Humanitarian Society. "I agree that these practices ought to be outlawed, but instead of sinking to the same level of these fanatics and killing our fellow people, why not simply start a re-education program? Even the worst person can be rehabilitated into a useful member of society, with enough time, care, and lots and lots of funding!"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 4.
Tarabostes - Without Cars, Going Nowhere Fast
Government Acts
The Issue
Ever since the government banned automobiles, furious soccer moms and commuters have been petitioning the government to revoke the ban, citing any number of troubles people have had without their cars.
The Debate
"The government was being utterly stupid in banning cars, especially at the whim of a bunch of nutjob, tree-hugging bicyclists!" cries Jean-Paul Longbottom, CEO of Coo' Stuff, Inc. "My workers are constantly late, they don't work as much because they have to leave early to walk or bike home... leaving this ban in place will only murder the economy!"
"Well, it's extremely difficult to drive my son to and from school and his after-school sports," comments soccer mom Jazz du Pont. "But I don't want my boy inhaling all those icky fumes. I say bring back cars, but put some effort into finding cleaner fuels and the like! Who cares if it costs a small fortune?"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
"What do they know?" whispers a strange woman clad all in green. "You ought to clamp down on these protesters. Without cars, the people are much easier for you to control, are they not?"
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 2.
An Archaeological Altercation
Government Acts
The Issue
During the construction of a new Hyper-Mega-Ultra-Super Mall, construction workers have unearthed what appears to be an ancient temple. A furious debate has arisen between those who wish to preserve it, and those who need their retail therapy.
The Debate
"This is the perfect opportunity to learn more of our nation's history!" says Professor Freddy Longfellow, head of the archaeological department of the Tarabostes History Museum. "All building work must be halted immediately so that my team can study this remarkable piece of our nation's past. To bury these ruins under some concrete eyesore would be criminal!"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
"It's all very nice to get to know some more about our past," argues foreman Konrad Winters. "But that's just the thing! It's the past! We must think of the future. If you allow those decrepit fossils to take over this place, you put at risk the future of our economy! Today it's archaeological digs, tomorrow it's 'preservation of the environment'. Just let me bulldoze the worthless pile of rubble and bury it under a few hundred tonnes of concrete."
"Behold, the hour has arrived! The Holy Temple of Firefury Amahira has been unearthed!" proclaims Yon-Zhauryg v'Klot, leader of the Cult of the Undead Sabertooth-tiger. "This land is sacred, and must not be befouled by these corporations! No-one but the enlightened children of Firefury must be allowed to venture inside our rediscovered sanctuary, where we will perform the required rituals to please the Great Goddess and prevent Her from unleashing Her wrath upon the world."
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 1.
Minorities Demand Representation in TV Soaps
Government Acts
The Issue
Tarabostes's TV soaps--famous around the region--have come under fire for their lack of ethnic diversity.
The Debate
"Every night my family and I sit down to watch 'The Brash and the Backstabbing'," says Roxanne Jefferson. "But where are the Liliputians like myself? Where are the Bigtopians? The Marche Noirians? People from those cultures can be just as brash and backstabbing, but we never see them on the screen. The government must act to remove this silent apartheid from our TV screens."
"Those Liliputians don't know how good they have it," says Calvin du Pont, spokesperson for the Tasmanians Against Ethnic Stereotyping. "Tasmanians are on television all the time, but always in crude, stereotypical roles. The answer is not to enforce ethnic quotas, but to award government prizes for the positive portrayal of minorities. That'll work better, and be cheaper, too."
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
"The government should do what now?" says TV studio executive Charles Falopian. "You've got to be kidding. We make soaps here, not documentaries. I should be able to put whichever characters I want into my shows. Quotas! Government prizes! God save me! Hasn't the government got anything better to do? Why don't they just back off and let society work out these things on its own?"
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 2.
Two Parties For Too Long?
Government Acts
The Issue
Representatives of several minor political parties have joined their voices to object to stiff ballot access requirements.
The Debate
"Two-party politics is squeezing the life out of democracy in Tarabostes," laments May Winters, leader of the Pragmatic Radical Party. "The Liberal Conservatives and Progressive Traditionalists have a monopoly on public policy - or duopoly, whatever you want to call it. The point is that there's hardly any difference between them, and their chokehold on the electoral process lets hacks and crooks stay in office forever. Ballot access rules must be loosened so we can give the voters a truly democratic choice."
"People are afraid to support 'third' parties because they're afraid of seeing the 'bad guys' get elected," says Samuel Dodinas, a ballot stastician. "But if we changed the system to allow preferential voting, where you can have your votes divvied up among your other candidates if your favourite doesn't recieve a certain number of votes, then that wouldn't be a problem. Then you could let as many parties as you wanted into the game. Deserving candidates wouldn't be harmed - they'd win! Maybe a few radicals would get through, but that just proves what a great system it is!"
"What ever happened to 'one man, one vote'?" asks Bill Chicago, chairperson of the Liberal Conservative National Committee. "Changing the rules will just let all sorts of crackpots clog up the ballot and overwhelm voters with names they don't recognise - this will draw attention and support away from legitimate candidates! How do you expect the nation to function properly if the government doesn't have public support? Oh, and by the way, the Liberal Conservative Party presents a VERY clear alternative to the destructive agenda of the Progressive Traditionalists, and I'll wallop anyone who says otherwise."
"Opposition parties are such a bother," muses Bianca Gutenberg, your chief of staff. "If we allowed as many of them to be politicians as those fools in the Pragmatic Radical Party want, it would be very hard on the tax payers - and our own position in power. If we re-wrote the election rules so that a party had to reapply for recognition every time it failed to win a certain number of votes, we could knock our opposition out of the ring for good! Hey, the voters have spoken, and they asked for us. I think that just about settles it, don't you?"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 4.
Violent Violetists Demand Blood!
Government Acts
The Issue
Members of a new weird religious cult, called the Order of Violet, ask for the government to appease their mighty god by offering Her a sacrifice of the human variety.
The Debate
"What have we got to lose?" says religious freedoms advocate Falala Summers. "Just cut up a few homeless folk - it appeases this group's bloodthirsty Goddess, gets rid of unsightly bums that drain welfare, and everybody goes home happy."
"We must go much further than a few beggars!" argues the overzealous High Member of the Order of Violet, Samuel O'Bannon. "You must pass a law that everyone’s first born child must be slaughtered, on live TV if possible. Think of the viewing figures!"
"You aren't going to listen to these whackjob Violetists, are you?" comments Larry Christmas while leading a prayer group. "Human sacrifices! Surely we're too civilized to permit such barbaric practices! These lunatic fringe groups should be outlawed, their leaders should be executed!"
"Who's being a lunatic?" retorts Peggy Gutenberg of the Tarabostes Humanitarian Society. "I agree that these practices ought to be outlawed, but instead of sinking to the same level of these fanatics and killing our fellow people, why not simply start a re-education program? Even the worst person can be rehabilitated into a useful member of society, with enough time, care, and lots and lots of funding!"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 4.
Tarabostes - Without Cars, Going Nowhere Fast
Government Acts
The Issue
Ever since the government banned automobiles, furious soccer moms and commuters have been petitioning the government to revoke the ban, citing any number of troubles people have had without their cars.
The Debate
"The government was being utterly stupid in banning cars, especially at the whim of a bunch of nutjob, tree-hugging bicyclists!" cries Jean-Paul Longbottom, CEO of Coo' Stuff, Inc. "My workers are constantly late, they don't work as much because they have to leave early to walk or bike home... leaving this ban in place will only murder the economy!"
"Well, it's extremely difficult to drive my son to and from school and his after-school sports," comments soccer mom Jazz du Pont. "But I don't want my boy inhaling all those icky fumes. I say bring back cars, but put some effort into finding cleaner fuels and the like! Who cares if it costs a small fortune?"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
"What do they know?" whispers a strange woman clad all in green. "You ought to clamp down on these protesters. Without cars, the people are much easier for you to control, are they not?"
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 2.
joi, 3 ianuarie 2008
Decizii festive
Tarabostes Decides:
Traffic Cops Needed on Information Superhighway?
Government Acts
The Issue
Certain shadowy ministerial figures have proposed government monitoring of individual internet usage.
The Debate
1."In these days of terror and uncertainty, it's exactly what we need," says Roger Silk, signing an arrest warrant. "Every pervert, terrorist, bomb-building maniac and anti-government idiot is currently online. I'm not saying that we should block citizens from seeing it, but let's also watch who's seeking it out. This will give our law enforcement officers the chance to prevent crimes before they happen. If you've done nothing wrong, you've got nothing to hide."
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
2."Well, I AM saying we should block out that filth," says a man in a dark hat, stepping from the shadows. "If people want to use the internet, they can view our government-approved sites. Those are swell."
3.Privacy activist Dave Summers is outraged, as usual. "Tyranny is the natural result of limiting information! Someone, somewhere, will always find something offensive -- mimes for example. Those scare the hell out of me. But should we ban them? No! Free the internet! We have nothing to fear from free information but pop-up advertising!"
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 1.
Police Wanting Help With Their Inquiries
Government Acts
The Issue
After delayed DNA evidence put a notorious rapist behind bars the police have demanded that it be mandatory for those accused of a crime to surrender blood and tissue samples to aid the elimination process.
The Debate
1."I'm surprised this hasn't been brought up sooner," says Chief Constable Larry Wong. "If we have DNA samples of all the accused it will make solving crimes like rape and murder that much faster! Sure, some people will think it's a tad invasive, but in my experience if you're worried by something like giving up a few drops of the red stuff then you've probably got something to hide."
2."This is a breach of privacy in every meaning of the word!" criminal defence attorney Fleur Falopian exclaims. "Or three words, but this is an outrage! It's these peoples' bodies, not the government's nor the police's. If they want to give a DNA sample it should be THEIR decision! Now I'll admit there have been times when DNA sampling has helped solve a case or two but shouldn't we be upholding the inherent right of every man and woman to have their body remain unmolested unless they should so choose it? Undoubtedly! DNA sampling should only take place with the person's informed consent."
3."What about the victims of these crimes?" asks DI Charles du Pont, ever gruff and stalwart in the face of adversity. "Do they not have rights? Their right to privacy's been violated so it ought to be the responsibility of the criminal to give up his own. What I propose is the collection of DNA samples from every citizen in Tarabostes so we can track down the culprit if none of our suspects come up with anything. It'll be expensive, sure, there's 133 million people to go through... but it's just a small blood sample. Don't you think it's worth it?"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 3.
Tarabostes Plagued By STD Epidemic!
Government Acts
The Issue
A medical report has detailed a twenty-fold increase in infection rates over the past ten years of the sexually transmitted disease VODAIS (Viral Overactive Dysfunction of the Auto-Immune System). People all over the nation are petitioning that the government do something about the epidemic.
The Debate
1."This situation is about to explode. At this rate, this epidemic could severely impact our economy, our way of life, and even our government," says Doctor Klaus Mistletoe. "We must supply powerful drugs to all infected people, even if we have to produce and distribute it ourselves. We must also educate people on the dangers of VODAIS and supply condoms to all sexually active males. Sure, we'll need to divert tax money from the military to fund all this, but what good is a military if the soldiers are too sick to fight?"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
2."If you supply condoms, you'll increase sexual promiscuity," scoffs religious leader Freddy Broadside. "If you supply drugs, you'll risk creating an aura of invincibility which in turn increases sexual promiscuity. Sexual abstinence is 100% effective in preventing VODAIS infection. This knowledge must be taught at all schools and workplaces, and all other choices must be ridiculed. Make celibacy the only option!"
3."Supplying drugs and condoms will not stop VODAIS infections and forcing everyone to be celibate will be the slow death of Tarabostes," whispers Health Minister Billy Hamilton in a poorly-lit back room. "Segregating the infected people is the most effective method. Everybody in Tarabostes must be tested for VODAIS. Then all the VODAIS positive people will be shipped to seperate gated communities away from the rest of us. If they need to mingle with uninfected people, then they must wear distinguishing badges that feature a Grim Reaper holding a skeletal sabertooth-tiger."
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 1.
Genetics Brings New Life to Extinct Species
Government Acts
The Issue
Scientists have announced they are close to a breakthrough in their quest to revive the feather-bellied sabertooth-tiger, a species related to Tarabostes's national animal that has been extinct for more than a century.
The Debate
1."I, for one, applaud their work," says scientist Pete Longbottom. "And not just because I'm the project leader. This is an example of how Tarabostes's brains can mix it with the world's best. Can you imagine how wonderful it will be to have feather-bellied sabertooth-tigers frolicking in the meadows again? I say full steam ahead, and more government funding!"
2."This is a sacrilege!", says religious leader Al Washington. "These animals are extinct because God wants them dead. Cloning them would merely incur his wrath! If we proceed down this path, it'll be humans, not the feather-bellied sabertooth-tiger, who will be extinct."
3."Now, come on," says Beth Mistletoe, well-known philosopher. "You don't need to be religious to be unnerved by the top of this particular slippery slope. Today it's sabertooth-tigers, tomorrow it's dinosaurs, and we all know how that turns out. This research shouldn't be banned, but there must be strict government controls over its use."
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 3.
Traffic Cops Needed on Information Superhighway?
Government Acts
The Issue
Certain shadowy ministerial figures have proposed government monitoring of individual internet usage.
The Debate
1."In these days of terror and uncertainty, it's exactly what we need," says Roger Silk, signing an arrest warrant. "Every pervert, terrorist, bomb-building maniac and anti-government idiot is currently online. I'm not saying that we should block citizens from seeing it, but let's also watch who's seeking it out. This will give our law enforcement officers the chance to prevent crimes before they happen. If you've done nothing wrong, you've got nothing to hide."
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
2."Well, I AM saying we should block out that filth," says a man in a dark hat, stepping from the shadows. "If people want to use the internet, they can view our government-approved sites. Those are swell."
3.Privacy activist Dave Summers is outraged, as usual. "Tyranny is the natural result of limiting information! Someone, somewhere, will always find something offensive -- mimes for example. Those scare the hell out of me. But should we ban them? No! Free the internet! We have nothing to fear from free information but pop-up advertising!"
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 1.
Police Wanting Help With Their Inquiries
Government Acts
The Issue
After delayed DNA evidence put a notorious rapist behind bars the police have demanded that it be mandatory for those accused of a crime to surrender blood and tissue samples to aid the elimination process.
The Debate
1."I'm surprised this hasn't been brought up sooner," says Chief Constable Larry Wong. "If we have DNA samples of all the accused it will make solving crimes like rape and murder that much faster! Sure, some people will think it's a tad invasive, but in my experience if you're worried by something like giving up a few drops of the red stuff then you've probably got something to hide."
2."This is a breach of privacy in every meaning of the word!" criminal defence attorney Fleur Falopian exclaims. "Or three words, but this is an outrage! It's these peoples' bodies, not the government's nor the police's. If they want to give a DNA sample it should be THEIR decision! Now I'll admit there have been times when DNA sampling has helped solve a case or two but shouldn't we be upholding the inherent right of every man and woman to have their body remain unmolested unless they should so choose it? Undoubtedly! DNA sampling should only take place with the person's informed consent."
3."What about the victims of these crimes?" asks DI Charles du Pont, ever gruff and stalwart in the face of adversity. "Do they not have rights? Their right to privacy's been violated so it ought to be the responsibility of the criminal to give up his own. What I propose is the collection of DNA samples from every citizen in Tarabostes so we can track down the culprit if none of our suspects come up with anything. It'll be expensive, sure, there's 133 million people to go through... but it's just a small blood sample. Don't you think it's worth it?"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 3.
Tarabostes Plagued By STD Epidemic!
Government Acts
The Issue
A medical report has detailed a twenty-fold increase in infection rates over the past ten years of the sexually transmitted disease VODAIS (Viral Overactive Dysfunction of the Auto-Immune System). People all over the nation are petitioning that the government do something about the epidemic.
The Debate
1."This situation is about to explode. At this rate, this epidemic could severely impact our economy, our way of life, and even our government," says Doctor Klaus Mistletoe. "We must supply powerful drugs to all infected people, even if we have to produce and distribute it ourselves. We must also educate people on the dangers of VODAIS and supply condoms to all sexually active males. Sure, we'll need to divert tax money from the military to fund all this, but what good is a military if the soldiers are too sick to fight?"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
2."If you supply condoms, you'll increase sexual promiscuity," scoffs religious leader Freddy Broadside. "If you supply drugs, you'll risk creating an aura of invincibility which in turn increases sexual promiscuity. Sexual abstinence is 100% effective in preventing VODAIS infection. This knowledge must be taught at all schools and workplaces, and all other choices must be ridiculed. Make celibacy the only option!"
3."Supplying drugs and condoms will not stop VODAIS infections and forcing everyone to be celibate will be the slow death of Tarabostes," whispers Health Minister Billy Hamilton in a poorly-lit back room. "Segregating the infected people is the most effective method. Everybody in Tarabostes must be tested for VODAIS. Then all the VODAIS positive people will be shipped to seperate gated communities away from the rest of us. If they need to mingle with uninfected people, then they must wear distinguishing badges that feature a Grim Reaper holding a skeletal sabertooth-tiger."
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 1.
Genetics Brings New Life to Extinct Species
Government Acts
The Issue
Scientists have announced they are close to a breakthrough in their quest to revive the feather-bellied sabertooth-tiger, a species related to Tarabostes's national animal that has been extinct for more than a century.
The Debate
1."I, for one, applaud their work," says scientist Pete Longbottom. "And not just because I'm the project leader. This is an example of how Tarabostes's brains can mix it with the world's best. Can you imagine how wonderful it will be to have feather-bellied sabertooth-tigers frolicking in the meadows again? I say full steam ahead, and more government funding!"
2."This is a sacrilege!", says religious leader Al Washington. "These animals are extinct because God wants them dead. Cloning them would merely incur his wrath! If we proceed down this path, it'll be humans, not the feather-bellied sabertooth-tiger, who will be extinct."
3."Now, come on," says Beth Mistletoe, well-known philosopher. "You don't need to be religious to be unnerved by the top of this particular slippery slope. Today it's sabertooth-tigers, tomorrow it's dinosaurs, and we all know how that turns out. This research shouldn't be banned, but there must be strict government controls over its use."
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 3.
La inceput de an
The Federation of Tarabostes
"Assimilation by preparation"
UN Category: Corrupt Dictatorship
Civil Rights: Below Average
Economy: Reasonable
Political Freedoms: Outlawed
Location: Romania
Regional Influence: Minnow
The Federation of Tarabostes is a very large, safe nation, notable for its devotion to social welfare. Its cynical population of 133 million are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.
It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of the Environment, Education, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 100%. A small but healthy private sector is dominated by the Information Technology industry.
The country has been 'going shopping' by annexing nearby nations for their resources, popular political cartoonists are thrown in jail for inciting dissent, the government has legalised small-scale capitalism, and long arduous trials are held for the most trivial of offences. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tarabostes's national animal is the sabertooth-tiger, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its currency is the forlorn.
Tarabostes is ranked 40th in the region and 33,807th in the world for Most Subsidized Industry.
"Assimilation by preparation"
UN Category: Corrupt Dictatorship
Civil Rights: Below Average
Economy: Reasonable
Political Freedoms: Outlawed
Location: Romania
Regional Influence: Minnow
The Federation of Tarabostes is a very large, safe nation, notable for its devotion to social welfare. Its cynical population of 133 million are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.
It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of the Environment, Education, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 100%. A small but healthy private sector is dominated by the Information Technology industry.
The country has been 'going shopping' by annexing nearby nations for their resources, popular political cartoonists are thrown in jail for inciting dissent, the government has legalised small-scale capitalism, and long arduous trials are held for the most trivial of offences. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tarabostes's national animal is the sabertooth-tiger, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its currency is the forlorn.
Tarabostes is ranked 40th in the region and 33,807th in the world for Most Subsidized Industry.
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