Ia sa ne mai decidem

Tarabostes Decides:
Animal Experimentation Laws Under Scrutiny
Government Acts
The Issue

Scientists and animal rights activists have once again brought up the debate over animal experimentation to your attention.
The Debate

1. "What have those poor, defenceless animals ever done to us?" asks Roger Mombota, owner of the East Tarabostes sabertooth-tiger Sanctuary. "Kidnapping these helpless creatures from their habitat simply to stick probes and needles in them is just barbaric! How would you like it if someone caged you in a lab and conducted tests on you just to find out whether a new product was fit for sale? Experimenting on animals ought to be banned!"

2. "It is not unethical," replies Dr. Abraham Chicago, the chief surgeon at Tarabostes's largest Cancer Research Clinic. "The unethical thing to do would be to deny the public of the benefit of the great scientific advancements we're making! If we have to sacrifice some animals in the name of science, healthcare, or a commerical venture, then that's just what we've got to do! Think of the lives we could save! All we require is more government support and funding for this worthy cause."

The Government Position
The government is preparing to dismiss this issue.

Dangerously Cheesy
Government Acts
The Issue

The popular daily cartoon strip "Barry the sabertooth-tiger" has always been highly critical of the political system within Tarabostes, but in recent weeks the cartoon has depicted the main characters throwing melted cheese at unpopular politicians. Inspired by this, protestors armed with fondue sets stormed a government building, cheesing off several government officials.
The Debate

1. "It's just a bit of harmless fun!", says Freddy Wall, creator of Barry the sabertooth-tiger, while spraying your advisors with melted cheddar. "If the government were doing a better job people wouldn't feel the need to throw cheese at them. We should be free to express our displeasure in any way we choose. Besides, my cartoon books are selling like hot cakes, and that's got to be good for the economy, right?"

2. "This has got to stop!" insists Pip Summers, head of the censorship board. "I spent 3 hours this morning scraping wensleydale out of my hair! Arrest these lunatics! The protestors and the people responsible for this vile cartoon, throw them all into jail!"
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.

3. "Arrrrrgh!" screams lactose-intolerant Hack Longbottom, a member of the public safety board, as incoming rounds of mature gouda smash the windows and claim the suits of several nearby advisors. "As I've been saying for many years now, cheese is a dangerous weapon in the wrong hands and should be outlawed. Ban all cheese now, and enforce it!"

The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 2.

A Capital Idea
Government Acts
The Issue

A crowd of penniless ex-businessmen have amassed in Tarabostes's capital city, demanding that the government return all the nationalised industry to private control.
The Debate

1. "GREED IS GOOD!" bellows Bianca Jong-Il, a famous advocate of capitalism. "The economy is stagnating terribly under government control. Complete privatisation is the only option here. It's time to give power back to the people! Well, rich people, anyway..."

2. "This it outrageous!" cries armchair revolutionary, Roger Mistletoe. "The government must maintain the principles of equality and socialism that we fought so hard for, and not sell the country to corrupt and greedy corporations. We must eject these shameful capitalists from our great nation at once!"

3. "Hey, aren't we all being a little extreme about this?" says noted economist, Billy Spirit. "Surely we could just keep the key industries, such as the electricity and water supplies, under government control and lessen the regulations on the others so they could function more independently? That way, the people can't complain that they are at the mercy of big business, and industries such as retail can function more effectively."
This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.

The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 3.

Raise Duel Standards, Say Fencers
Government Acts
The Issue

A number of well-dressed gentlemen wearing a varied assortment of swords is insisting that they be allowed to settle their private disputes on the field of honourable battle.
The Debate

1. "We must be permitted our inherent right to defend our honour through feats of arms!" exclaims Buffy King, a bewigged aristocrat sporting a particularly flamboyant swept-hilt rapier. "The right to duel is one found throughout history for the honourable settling of disputes and I must insist that my right to fight be recognised! The world would be so much better - and cheaper too - if conflicts of interest were sorted through trial by combat instead of trial by jury."

2. "Swords? Heavens, what dreadful things. All sharp and pointy - quite dangerous, you know," says Stephanie Hamilton, an ardent pacifist. "Duelling ought to be banned! The best way to settle these kind of arguments are through trials, we all know that. If we go ahead with what these duelling nutters want then innocent people will die! It will be a sad day when people value money more than justice. Apart from lawyers, obviously."

This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.

The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 2.